I haven’t posted here in a really, really long time. In Internet years, I think it runs about a decade.
It’s not that I don’t have anything to say. In fact, I’ve been writing regularly on Quora and in the comments sections of tons of other blogs. I’ve spent hours on certain Facebook Groups and in discussions on Twitter. Anyone who has shared realspace with me can tell you that I’m seldom at a loss for things to discuss.
But when it comes to blogging? I haven’t posted a thing in months.
It’s a horrible thing to admit to if you work in some aspect of Social Media. It essentially tells people that you aren’t participating in this whole online discussion that we talk so much about. Not unlike saying “do as I say, not as I do.”
But there’s this point where anyone who has a blog hits an invisible wall. Some people power through it anyways – posting uninspired albeit still well written posts. Some take an unintended break – usually to come back shortly thereafter with a ‘huh, nothing dire happened while I was gone’ post. Some of us though take the unintended break and then don’t come back quickly. *cough -me- cough*
There’s this moment you pass over – seldom noticed at the time – where you have said “oh I’ve been meaning to post about that” one too many times and you start thinking “how do I just start back up? Do I have to explain my absence? Have I lost whatever audience I built up? Will I find the right thing to post about first? What if nobody even noticed I was gone??“
And the silence starts being this big, scary entity that has to be overcome.
I was talking to my daughter about embarrassment the other day – because she’s got a newly profound understanding of the phrase “but what if I’m embarrassed?” like any girl her age does. It’s something I think gets learned sooner by kids with older siblings, but is just as easily caught from friends, schoolmates, television shows and even parents. Whatever it is, we as human beings are extremely susceptible to the fear of embarrassment. It’s the source of all of those archetypal dreams like showing up for school naked and the basis for all sorts of uncomfortable humor centered around one guy being red-faced (literally) due to something blush-worthy.
So what does it take to overcome a silence that is almost as loud and deafening as someone screaming in your ear like a jet engine?
Maybe a whisper. Maybe just a word or two. Maybe just a post.
If you’ll pardon me – I’ve got some majorly overdue whispering to do. I hope you can still hear me through the silence. Rest assured, I’m embarrassed, but not truly ready to be silenced.
Ready? Set. Go…